Inform me, weary traveller: After I say the phrases “peasant railgun”, what picture is summoned to your thoughts. A high-tech rifle used to liberate the working class of a fantasy world? No. It is 2,280 hirelings standing in a line, utilizing guidelines chicanery and a fairly stable misunderstanding of how TTRPGs work to argue {that a} sufficiently motivated workforce can fling a ladder at 1,188 miles per hour.
This complete thought is extra of a enjoyable thought train, relatively than one thing that was out there to gamers in fifth version Dungeons & Dragons. Whereas, sure, a line of two,280 creatures might transfer an object that distance with their readied actions, it additionally depends on making use of the principles for a falling object to one thing going, you recognize, sideways, with the proletariat fulfilling the function of gravity.
That is, to place it merely, nonsense—guidelines as written, the ladder would zip a number of thousand toes earlier than being (best-case state of affairs) hucked as an improvised thrown weapon for a mighty 1d4 bludgeoning harm. Possibly 1d12 if the DM is glad to simply accept {that a} ladder is equal to a greatclub.
Nicely, I am happy to report {that a} genius by the identify of Deathpacito-01 from the dndnext subreddit has cooked up one other peasant-based technique which, whereas most likely nonetheless not permissible by any wise DM, is technically inside rules-as-written territory (thanks, Wargamer): “Do I feel it’s best to do that at your desk? No. I am not posting this as a suggestion, however relatively as a warning.”
The peasant jackhammer works as follows. The 1st step: forged the brand new 2024 rulebook’s model of Conjure Woodland Beings, which works a bit like Spirit Guardians, now. It offers a decent 5d8 power harm “every time a creature you may see enters the emanation or ends its flip there,” however, says Wizards of the Coast, wagging its mighty finger, “A creature makes this save solely as soon as per flip.”
That “as soon as per flip” bit is the essential half. As a result of the brand new ruleset permits you to auto-fail a examine to be grappled if you would like, you would, hypothetically, rent a coterie of peasants to—on every of their separate turns, which is able to reset the “as soon as per flip” restrict on the spell’s harm—laboriously shuffle your aura backwards and forwards into the creature’s area as many instances as, theoretically, you will have peasants to flood the initiative order.
Utilizing the instance of a Purple Worm, Deathpacito-01 writes: “Assuming the druid has 18 WIS and a spell save DC of 15, the Purple Worm will fail the save 75% of the time. The entire anticipated harm is 100d8*0.75 + (100d8*0.25)/2 = 393.75 harm per spherical.”
Now, granted, this technique’s acquired a few weaknesses. First off, you are banking in your 20+ peasants not unionising earlier than you march them into battle, or dying by the hands of a fireball, or a stiff breeze. D&D additionally is not a videogame with exhausting code—at any time, the DM can stare at you, say “no, that is silly” and scupper your complete plan.
It’s, nevertheless, pleasingly in-tradition and—extra importantly—extra rules-legit than its predecessor. It additionally fills me with a way of delight that this nonsense has been found in lower than per week—two days, by my mark, given the brand new Participant’s Handbook was launched on September 17, and the publish was made September 19. D&D’s R&D division strikes quicker than a ladder by way of the fingers of two,280 beleaguered farmers.